Avery the Photographer

Avery has recently taken an interest in my camera and how it works. She has been asking quite frequently if she can take some pictures.

Here are a few of the ones she's taken in the past few days....

Daddy and Jerri

Daddy

Jerri

Mommy, Cassie, Daddy

Jerri in her bed

Mommy, Daddy, Cassie

Not bad huh?!

My Heart Aches

My heart aches.

If you haven't read this story yet about Ben Sauer....you must.

I'm giving you warning that it's not a very happy story.

My heart just aches for this family.

Their little boy is a month older than Avery. Their baby is Cassandra's age. They are from a suburb extremely close to where I grew up.

I can't fathom the news they have received or how they are even dealing with it.

It blows my mind that one day your child is running around completely normal and within a few days you find out the most devastating news that you can possibly receive about your child.

And they appear to be handling it with such grace and optimism. I don't think I would. Of course you never know until you are put into that position, but I just can't imagine it.

Whether you pray or not, please keep this family in your thoughts. They need it.

And remember that every moment you have on this Earth is a gift.

Hug and kiss your loved ones. Tell them you love them. Enjoy the beauty in the small things (and large too!). Embrace every day as just that-a new day. Be thankful you have another day to spend living your life. 

I Love One

I somehow forgot how much I love the age one.

I swear I forgot this stage with Avery-I barely remember her not talking, not walking, etc. And her as an infant?! Yeah, totally blocked out of my mind. I think the lack of sleep when they're newborns plays a part in that.

Anyways, this age/stage that Cassandra is at is one of my favorites.

Cassandra knows what we're saying, yet can't really communicate back (which is nice sometimes-haha!). She has a few actual words and a few signs, but really she doesn't come out and use them on her own. She mostly just repeats you when you say them. And I love hearing her starting to say words-it's so much fun!

Cassandra hasn't started the tantrum phase yet although I have a feeling it's on the horizon! With Avery having meltdowns daily, you forget that there is an age where they don't do that yet! It's definitely not as challenging as the 2-3yr stage, that's for sure!

my new trick!

She's mobile enough to get what she wants, but not so mobile that I'm ripping my hair out. Basically, she's crawling and not walking yet.

She's pretty independent-wants to feed herself and plays by herself really well....

Yet she's still my baby girl who comes crawling to Mama for a snuggle. I love watching her explore and discover the world around her. To be able to see things through her eyes would be amazing!

Her little personality is starting to show now and the little person inside is emerging. She does so many cute things these days (pic below included) and I could just eat her up!

If I could freeze time, I totally would right now! I just want her to stay this way awhile longer....please?!

One Month

One month....

We have officially been moved into the new house for one month already.

Part of me feels like we've been here awhile and part of me feels like we just moved in.

The first week or two were odd. I think Gabe and I both felt unsettled. I chalk that up to the fact that we were going to the old house almost daily to get things that we needed. And also the fact that he had lived there for ten years and I lived there for six years. For me, as soon as I turned onto the old street, it felt like I was coming "home". I would get that relaxed feeling and think "I'm home" when actually I wasn't anymore. I'd open the door to an (almost) empty house and it was an odd feeling. Then I'd come back to the new house and not feel fully settled here either. I think it was really challenging for us at first because we sort of felt like we didn't "belong" at either place.

I will say that now I'm feeling more like this is home. I think decorating for Christmas really helped-the tree is up and decorations that we normally would put out at the old house are now put out here. So it's familiar stuff in a new place. I think that has helped me feel settled. Plus, we hosted our first party over the weekend and I think that helped too. Getting to entertain and show off the place was nice.

I think Avery settled in pretty well. She hasn't mentioned the old house in a long time now. We purposely haven't taken her there since moving day and I don't know how she would do if we did take her there. Part of me wonders if she remembers it at all but I don't want to bring it up to her either.

I was at the old house once last week and actually didn't even go in....I forgot the key! So it's been awhile since I've been to the old house. We still have some things to empty out of there one of these days. And we're still getting mail delivered there so we have to go every now and then to pick that up as well.

First month down...many, many more to come!

Sacrifices

I had the idea for this post back when I first got pregnant in the early summer. And I'm just getting to it now for some reason. For those who haven't been pregnant and for the men out there, this is just a little insight as to how a woman's life changes when that test comes out "positive".


Sacrifices....

A definition-"to surrender or give up, for the sake of something else"

That's what pregnancy is all about (and if you breastfeed, it continues).

As soon as I got the positive home pregnancy test, a switch flipped and my lifestyle changed.

No more alcohol (like I drank much anyways).

No more caffeine (with Avery this included chocolate-this time around I was a little more relaxed).

No more diet drinks (no nutrasweet, etc).

No more lunch meat.

No more soft cheeses (blue cheese, feta, etc).

.....For the next 40 weeks of pregnancy. And if you breastfeed? Well, the alcohol/caffeine/diet drinks don't come back until you wean. I'll have those things in very limited amounts while breastfeeding, but not like I normally would.

Yep, making sacrifices for the sake of your child-you basically give up your body to grow another human being (how weird is that to think of?!) for the good part of a year.

It's amazing how one little test turns into you not "owning" your own body for roughly 2 years (if you breastfeed). My body becomes my child's during that time.

Yes, it's difficult.

Worth it? You bet!

I will say though that by the end, I'm ready to have my body back. As much as I loved pregnancy and nursing Avery, I was so relieved when she weaned. My boobs were my own again (sorry!) and I could eat and drink whatever I pleased whenever I liked. It was like I was handed a slice of freedom!

I don't know if it's more difficult the first time around or the second. The first time it seems harder at first because your lifestyle changes so much, but at the same time everything is so new and exciting. The second time you know what you're in for, but you know how long it'll be until that slice of freedom comes your way again. I'm down to 8 weeks of pregnancy, but the road is still long since I plan on nursing again. I won't get my slice for at least another year if all goes as planned.

Thankful

Today is the day we reflect on what we're thankful for.

I'm thankful for my wonderful husband every day. He is the rock that I lean on and my true partner in life. He supports me and loves me for who I am. And he is the best Daddy any little girl could ask for.

I'm thankful for my sweet angel, Avery. Even though she stresses us out sometimes and we get frustrated with her, she is also the light of our lives. I love watching the world through her eyes and I love watching her grow and learn new things. And I love her taking her first bite of cinnamon roll: only to put it down and eat her fruit instead (she does not have my sweet tooth just yet)! And I love that on this Thanksgiving, she drew her first face without any direction from me.

So what if it looks a little creepy?!

I'm thankful for baby #2 who will join us in roughly 9 weeks. I know life will change once again when he/she arrives, but it's all good. The whole thing is a miracle to me and it's amazing what the human body can do.

I'm thankful that we have a beautiful new house to call home. Even though it doesn't feel like home yet, it will. And it will be wonderful.

I'm thankful that we both have jobs in this economy. Some way to bring home a paycheck and buy the things that we need/want. I know there are many people out there who are not as fortunate.

I'm thankful for family-those related by blood and those that aren't. We had a larger than usual turn out for dinner today and it totally reminded me of Thanksgivings as a child-more people than you can cram at a table, kids having their own tables, etc. And I loved every minute of it. The more the merrier to me!

I'm thankful for my friends as well for they have had a place in my heart for years now. Even though we don't see each other that much anymore, we can still talk as if we saw each other yesterday. I miss them all dearly and wish that we all lived in the same area again so that our kids could grow up together. But, life has separated us all and we try our best to keep things going.

And I'm thankful for health-that all of our family and friends are healthy. You don't realize how good you have it until you hear of someone else's story. And health is one thing that you really don't have much control over. But we're all hangin' in there as of now.

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and that you have many, many things to be thankful for this year.

Two Nights

That's all that we have left in our house.

Two more nights.

It is the weirdest feeling-exciting, surreal, nerve wracking, and sad all at the same time.

I've been in this house for six years now. Gabe has been here ten.

We met when he lived here.

It was where we first lived together.

We got engaged in this house-in the living room on the couch by the fireplace.

We got our first pet while living here.

We got married while we lived here.

We started our family here.

It's weird to leave it all behind and start over somewhere new when you have all of these memories.
And of course I keep thinking of all of the last things we'll do here-Avery's last bath tomorrow night. Today was my last day to wake up and get ready for work here. Tomorrow will be our last dinner here, Saturday our last breakfast. Our last mornings of getting showered and dressed for the day. And of course tomorrow will be our last night sleeping in our bed in our room.

I know I will shed some tears-heck, I'm tearing up just writing this! Yes, I'm excited to move on, but I'm sad to see our home go. I love our neighborhood and our neighbors and I will say it has been an incredible 6 years here for me.

It will be an adjustment at our new place just because we're not in the actual city anymore. No more Wegman's, gas, or pizza right around the corner. No more easy access to the expressway. No more 5 minute drive to work for both of us (that I'm going to really miss!).

But with that, we will acquire more space, a bigger yard, an up-to-date house, a better school district, and our favorite-a garage!

And of course we'll create many more memories in our new house-our kids will be raised there! Heck, I don't even know if Avery will remember our current home. We'll have pictures to show her, but I doubt she'll actually remember living here....which makes me sad.



The next few days will be stressful, but I'm going to cherish our last moments here together as a family. And hopefully I'll take some photos of us enjoying our last day and night here tomorrow.

Can't Stop Thinking...

I recorded an Oprah show from Wednesday this week. I don't watch her show much, but it was about her staff being challenged to go vegan for a week. I thought it might be interesting, so I set the TV to record it.

I started watching the show today (and finished it tonight) and I can't stop thinking about it.

What was so thought provoking you ask?

In the first half of the show, they had a reporter take a tour of a slaughterhouse. Their thought? If you choose to eat meat, you should know where it comes from. Fair enough.

Here is the clip (graphic content)

That 5 minutes of video keeps playing over and over in my head.

I don't know what it is that has totally made me obsess about it. I'm not sure if it's the killing of the animals, or the thought of all of those people working there (they said they employ 2,000 people there). I mean seriously, who chooses that for their job? Yikes...makes me wonder if they're a little bit on the nutty side.

Will this make me become a vegetarian? Doubt it (I'm too picky of an eater to do that!). But I will say that it will make me think more about where my food comes from.

I think most of us think the one pound pack of ground beef we pick up every week at the grocery store is nothing. But when they say we kill something like 10 billion animals every year....that's just crazy to me. You'd think in a society like ours that is so "advanced" that there would be better options out there than this. And to think that the slaughterhouse they toured is one of the best in the country....scares me to think of what goes on at the other ones.

Just some "food for thought" for today!

Fall Softly

Today started like most days do....

Avery woke up, I got dressed and went in to get her. It was snowing really bad out, so we decided to stay in for the day. She had breakfast. We watched Sesame Street, which she loved. Did lots of playing. Then it was time for lunch. After lunch came nap time.

While she napped I got some stuff done around the house. Gabe got out of work early, so he came home shortly after 4. Avery was still asleep (surprisingly) so he went outside to do some shoveling.

It was getting close to 4:30 and I didn't want Avery to sleep ALL day long. So I headed upstairs to get her. Just as I was outside her door, I heard that she was awake. I went in to get her and pretty quickly she started saying "milk". She's pretty impatient so once she started asking, I took off her sleep sack and scooped her up and grabbed her sneakers in my hand. We headed downstairs....

And it happened....

I somehow missed the last step.

It happened so fast.

All I knew was my knees hit the floor hard and I was looking at Avery. Somehow my left hand clasped the side of her head, but it didn't matter.

I heard the thud of her head hitting hardwood floors.

And the scream that came out of her little body.

Again I scooped her up and ran to the front door. All I could hear was coughing and screaming. I flew open the door and banged on it loudly. Gabe came running in and I said, "I fell down the stairs with her."

We sat on the couch for what felt like an eternity....me rubbing her head and kissing her repeatedly. I kept checking to make sure she was ok-can she move her hands? Move her legs? Is she bleeding from anywhere?

She cried. I cried.

I have always feared falling with her, especially outside when it's icy. That's the one thing I'm terrified of. Never did I think it would happen in our house. Something so silly. I go up and down those steps numerous times a day without thinking. I can navigate them in pitch dark and do that everyday I get ready for work. How did I miss a step?!

Thankfully she is fine. After she got the crying out of her system, she carried on like normal. I don't know what was worse-her hitting her head or how much it just freaked her out. I feel terrible about it.

Parents are supposed to protect their kids, not be the ones who harm them. I know it was an accident, but I still feel horrible. I'm just glad we're both ok....it could have been a lot worse.

So if you fall this weekend, may you fall softly....

Thankful

Today is a day for giving thanks and taking time out to think about the things you do have and not the things you don't.

It's a day to step back and reflect.

A day to think of those little things we take for granted and realize that some people out there don't have those little things at all....things like food, clean water, shelter, electricity, heat, an income (or two). Things that we don't think twice about that many people out there just don't have.

I am thankful for many things. I obviously can't list them all because it would take me a very long time, but I can touch on a few.

I'm thankful for my husband, my better half. He is my everything and I don't know what I would do without his love and support. He is such a driven person and the most amazing Dad (I knew he would be!). I'm thankful everyday for that man.

And of course I'm thankful for this munchkin: look at that stinkin' face!

She is just a blessing. Yes, she's challenging at times, but when she runs up to you yelling "Mama" with her arms open wide for a hug, it's the best thing in the world. I love watching her grow into a little person-it's so fun to see (of course sad to see her not a baby anymore). I just love her to pieces.

I'm thankful for my amazing family and friends...without them I wouldn't be who I am or where I am today. I'm grateful to have so many wonderful people in my life to lean on.

I'm thankful for our home. It's warm and cozy and ours.

I'm thankful for our jobs-that we have security in this (still) struggling economy.

I'm thankful for the health of everyone around us. We have all been very fortunate to have good health.

We are so blessed in so many ways and we recognize it. I hope you all recognize the blessings in your life as well.

And a few photos from our day today to lighten the mood! We hung out in our jammies all morning and had cinnamon rolls and watched the parade. Gabe tried having Avery snuggle under the blanket:

but she wasn't interested:

She was quite the sleepy head at naptime...we woke her up after 3 hours because his family was waiting for our arrival-yeah, that wasn't the best idea because someone woke up very grumpy. But look how darn cute she is!

My Mom and Aunt Pat drove in to have dinner with us which was very nice!

And of course Avery had a blast with her cousins. She was all about giving Owen hugs and kisses!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

I'm a Convert!

I've been meaning to post about this for awhile and just haven't gotten to it!

I'm a makeup freak...have always been and probably always will be one. I love doing my makeup, buying makeup, trying new things out, etc.

I had a good routine going-Clinique foundation, Maybelline concealer, Clinique blush and loose powder, mascara (usually also Clinique) and occasionally eyeliner or eyeshadow. I did this routine for years-YEARS!

Until now....

In March I started using Bare Minerals. I know a few people who use it and love it. I was skeptical-it's hard to break a routine that you have and are happy with. I had a gift card to Sephora so I went there and had them test the foundation colors on me and I bought the kit.

I'll admit, at first I wasn't crazy about it. I feel like I have a lot of purple veins in my face and when I used it, I could still see them. However, other people (when I asked) said they couldn't tell that my makeup had changed. So that made me happy! After a few days, I got used to using the product and now I'm in love! It really is great!

Now when I look back at photos of me with my old routine, I could see the concealer in the photos-I don't know if the color was wrong or what, but I could tell I was wearing makeup. Of course I'm probably more picky since it's my skin and other people probably wouldn't notice a thing, but I could tell. Bare Minerals really feels like you have absolutely nothing on your face. And it looks very natural because it morphs to your skin color. And you use the same product as a foundation and concealer which is great so they blend together. Apparently it works wonders for people with "problem" skin and dry skin as well! We'll see what happens when the winter rolls around.

Oh, and another great thing? The kit is supposed to be a 6 month supply and I've been using it since early March (7 mos now) and still have a ton left-I'm guessing it'll be more like a year's supply for me!

If you haven't tried this stuff yet, do yourself a favor and try it! The pricetag might be scary ($60 for the starter kit), but think of what you spend on foundation, concealer, and powder every year...and you get 3 really great brushes as well! Plus, once you buy the kit, all you have to buy after that is the foundation and powder when you run out...which isn't that bad!

Eating and Sleeping "Fun"

One thing I've learned since Avery was born is that kids go through some crazy cycles.

Since she was 10 months old, she's been sleeping really well at night-12 hours straight usually without waking...and if she does wake, she puts herself back to sleep. She recently dropped down to 1 nap a day and depending on the day, it'll be short (1-1.5 hours) or long (2+ hours). This week we had an "off" sleep week. Wednesday was her surgery and that night she was up for 2 hours in the middle of the night then ended up sleeping in later than normal. Thursday night she did the same. Friday night she woke up twice overnight but put herself back to sleep like usual. Yesterday she took a later nap than normal (she went down around 2 instead of 1230ish) and slept for 3 hours! She didn't wake up until around 5pm so you can imagine that when bedtime came at 730, she had no interest in sleeping. She was up until 10pm then was up bright and early at 7am today! Today's nap stunk-only an hour long so by bedtime she was exhausted. It still took her awhile to fall asleep tonight, but hopefully she stays asleep all night and catches up.

Then there's the eating. Man, a few weeks ago she was a power eater! She would have several courses for each meal and would just inhale her food. She loves fruits and vegetables and we could count on her eating those for sure. This past week, she's been in a non-eating mode. She'll have 1-2 bites of something then it gets thrown on the floor. Anything we give her it's the same thing...I don't know if her rate of growth is slowing or what, but meal time has not been fun this week-she just doesn't want to eat and it gets frustrating for us!

Hopefully these things are just phases she's going through...another crazy cycle of Avery!

Bittersweet

Last night and tonight have been the start of something bittersweet....

If all goes according to plan, last night was my last time nursing Avery at bedtime (or anytime for that matter!).

I just decided it was time....

She has been down to nursing only once a day for at least a month now. I know she's not getting much anymore because I don't really hear her swallowing much. I have a feeling she wants it more out of habit and routine and to help her fall asleep.

I figured it would be easier to break it now then to wait until she's ready-heck, that could be months from now! And I thought the older she got, the harder it might be to break her of it.

So last night was it. Why last night? Well, I wanted to have a few days after at home in case I get engorged or uncomfortable at all. I think the chances of that are slim, but didn't want to take a risk. I had to work today, but am off the next four days for the long Labor day weekend so I thought it would be a good time.

It's been emotional though I will say. Last night while she nursed I tried to drink up every last second of it. I didn't rush her or anything and I just savored the time with her. I shed a few tears (and am shedding some now) while looking at that sweet face and thinking of our journey.

I went into breastfeeding very open-minded. I knew I wanted to try it, but if it didn't work out for us, it wouldn't have been the end of the world. It's probably one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life. It's stressful, time consuming, painful, and exhausting. But the rewards are countless. No matter how hard it was, I would do it again in a heartbeat. I honestly didn't think I would be so emotional about it ending, but I am.

I'm going to miss my bonding time with her-but I keep telling myself I can still bond with her, it'll just be in different ways. Plus, now Gabe can look forward to doing bedtime with her as well.

Tonight was the first night of not nursing her. I wasn't sure how it would go for either of us. We gave her a bath first, then Gabe got her dressed and ready for bed. I went in and we all read a story together. Once it was done, she started signing milk and looking at me. I picked her up and gave her some hugs and a kiss and Gabe told her he was going to give her milk tonight. She went back to him and drank out of her sippy cup (which is also new-she usually does a bottle if not nursing). He rocked and sang with her then put her to bed. About 10minutes later, she was sound asleep. It went so much easier than I anticipated. And I held up ok until I started writing this. I just hope it continues to go this smoothly!

I am finally going to have my body back....it's been almost 2 years since my body has been my own.

It will be mine.

And I will feel free.

And I'm proud that I nursed my baby for 14 months.

Silence

I haven't had a full day home alone since Avery was born.

Until today.

Granted, it's not the best circumstances since I'm home sick. I'm supposed to be working, but per doctor's orders I'm home until Monday.

So it's not like I'm enjoying my "free" day home. I've been in bed all day long (although I just showered to feel somewhat "normal"). I brought my laptop upstairs to occupy me. We don't even have a TV in our room, so it's been a quiet, uneventful day (except that our house is being worked on at the moment so I'm not truly home alone).

I have to admit it's weird.

I'm not used to the silence anymore.

I'm used to the pitter-patter of tiny feet on the hardwoods. The noises of her toys. The sounds of her excitement when she's playing.

It's weird not having any of that today.

I'm actually looking forward to them coming home tonight so my silence is broken!

Where's My Baby?

This past week has been a little hard on me-I feel like I'm "losing" my baby.

It just seems like all of a sudden she's doing all of these new things and growing up so fast.

She officially is sitting up all on her own. Not only that, but she has mastered going from lying to sitting as well. And her latest trick is going from sitting to lying down to sitting again and sort of spinning herself around. She definitely is finding ways of getting around.

She also sort of pushes up on her knees and bounces/rocks herself a bit. And she sometimes does a plank position with her hands and feet on the ground with her hips lifted high in the air.

Tooth #2 has broken through the gums now...my cute gummy smile is no more :(

We put her baby swing up in the attic since she hasn't been in it in about a month or so.

Yesterday I fed her some chunks of banana and she loved them-she wasn't thrilled with the puree of them a few weeks ago, but the chunks she went nuts for! I also put some banana in her mesh feeder and let her go to town-she loved that too, but boy was it messy and hard to clean out of the mesh:



I've definitely spent a lot of time reminiscing this week-thinking of when Avery was little and trying to capture all of these memories in my head. It's exciting seeing them learn new things and all of that, but sad that my baby is growing up so fast.

Moved

A blog was brought to my attention yesterday that totally moved me. I go on a chatboard pretty often and someone posted the link to this blog entry. Of course I had to read it to check it out.

If you haven't read the entry yet, please do so before you keep reading...I don't want to spoil anything for you! Just let me caution you-grab some Kleenex...you will need them I'm sure.

Here it is.

(waiting)


(waiting)


(waiting)


(waiting)


(still waiting)


(finished yet?)



I'll start by saying I was afraid to read the entry. I've clicked on links to blogs before only to find it's a post about someone's child passing away or the likes. Yes it's tragic, yes you can share that story...but those are very hard for me to read. So when I started reading this entry I'll admit I wasn't sure I would like it very much.

I was wrong. WAY wrong!

Yes it is depressing-her child has Down's Syndrome and they were not aware of it ahead of time.

But what totally caught me was the way the story was written. Holy cow-her blog puts mine to shame (can you tell I was a math/science geek and not a fan of writing?). The way she shared her story just blew me away. I was sucked in after a few sentences and had to see how it ended.

And the pictures! It was like she had a professional photographer there in the hospital room with her! I wish I had photos like that-WOW! (Edit-come to find out the woman IS a professional photographer! That explains it!)

I think the other thing that impressed me was how she remembered so much-it seemed like every detail was stuck in her head. I wish I could remember the day Avery was born that well. I'm sad to say that I can't. Yes, I remember it-I remember pieces of it, but I could never go into the detail that she did.

The story was very touching-I think she shared and vocalized a lot of feelings that many people would think in that situation, but wouldn't come out and say. I felt her pain, her sorrow, her shock. Things that would go through your head at that moment that you can't get out. Is anyone really prepared for a child with a disability? You might say you are, but what if that were you? Very thought provoking....

Simply beautiful, raw, and honest. That's what that post is. And I'm still thinking of it 24 hours later.

I'm speechless.

Put Her in Jail!

Gabe told me about a story at lunch today so I had to look it up when I got home.

This article makes me mad!

Seriously?! Changing a diaper on a stove-how genius is that?! Who in their right mind when they have a dirty diaper thinks "stove? Sounds like a good place to me!" Unreal! I just don't understand how that thought comes into your head. Especially a 44 year old woman who I'm sure reared kids of her own (which is a scary thought).

And who has to deal with the consequences? A sweet, innocent baby....for the rest of her life! That's unfair.

I hope her ass gets thrown in the slammer!

It's a Myth People, a Myth!!

What's the first thing people ask when you tell them you have a baby? Ok, besides gender, name, etc.

The dreaded question....

"Is he/she sleeping through the night?"

I loathe that question...loathe it.

When my response is "no" I know immediately what is going to follow.

First the look that's half pity, half "you suck as a parent". (And what's with the pressure for your child to sleep through the night anyways? Besides not feeling exhausted...)
Then the other comment that makes me cringe....

"is she eating cereal yet?"

As of today, my answer will be "yes" and is it helping her sleep? NO! Her sleeping is the same as it was weeks ago, in fact, it might even be worse than a few weeks ago.

It's an old wives tale people!! Cereal does not equal sleeping through the night!

A few months ago before I was even thinking of starting solids, I was looking through websites, books, magazines, email lists I'm on, etc. Most of them at some point mentioned that there has been new research going on about how starting solids has nothing to do with how a baby sleeps. They suggest starting solids closer to 6months (instead of 4) because there's really no benefit in doing them before.

I can't tell you how many people have told me that once Avery started cereal, she would sleep better. I work with patients everyday and heard the comment so frequently. I would just nod and smile and keep my thoughts to myself. Maybe they were right, maybe they were wrong. Would an old wives tale be correct or would this new research shine through? Time would tell....

We started Avery on cereal about a week before she was 6months. My gut told me it wouldn't change things, although I was secretly hoping it would. And the result?

Research seems like it's correct in our case. Cereal hasn't done a darn thing to help that child sleep better. She's eating it twice a day now along with some veggies and still waking up overnight like a champ!!

So, if someone tells you to try cereal before bed....you can, but don't get your hopes up too high!

Baby's First Christmas!

Christmas was very special for us this year since it was Avery's first Christmas. To be honest, I haven't looked forward to Christmas this much in a very long time. I know she's too young to understand what's going on and to really enjoy everything, but I still looked forward to it a lot this year. It gives you a different perspective to see a holiday through the eyes of a 6 month old.

Of course today was another bustling day. My cousins came over to my Mom's house at 10am for brunch. My one cousin was in from Tennessee and we haven't seen them in a few years. He came over along with his 2 daughters, Jessica and Jodi-they brought their significant others and their kids as well. It was quite a house full once again!
Madyson and Cayden opening gifts:

Madyson:

Grandma and Avery:

Avery opening a gift-she got a kick out of the wrapping paper. She would hang onto it real tight and we would pull the gift to unwrap it. Of course she wanted to eat the paper!

A new teether!

Let's try it out!

My Uncle Joe and Aunt Marion also stopped over to bring Avery a gift:


A new jacket and hat!

Avery really enjoyed my cousin Paul (in from TN):


After everyone left, we did gifts with my Mom....

A new doll:

We got a lot of nice things! Avery got a lot of practical things (cups, spoons, plates, clothes, etc) which was nice-I was expecting toy overload, but it wasn't too bad. Mom got us some nice things-clothes, slippers, entertainment book, a digital picture frame.

We left Buffalo around 4:45 and on the way home we stopped at Gabe's parents' house to say hello. We stayed about an hour and by that time it was past Avery's bedtime already so we came home and put her to sleep.

Once Avery was in bed, Gabe and I exchanged gifts. He got me a Starbucks gift card, a mascara sampler from Sephora and a beautiful piece of "Mommy jewelry". I'll have to take a picture of it to post-I love it!

We still have to celebrate Christmas with Gabe's side of the family-that will take place on New Years Day so we still have a celebration to look forward to.
Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you had a wonderful one!

Breastfeeding

Well it's been almost 6 months now and I don't think I've ever really posted about my breastfeeding experience.

I'll start out by saying that if you asked me 5 years ago if I would breastfeed, I'm not sure what my answer would have been. Probably no. I don't know what changed my mind about it, but I did. Maybe it was my Sister-in-law having her 2 kids and having her breastfeed them? I don't know....I went into it very open minded though. I wasn't like "I have to breastfeed" and I wasn't like "I have to use formula". I went into it thinking "I'm going to try and breastfeed-if it works out, it works out. If not, I have other options."

Things started out very rough for me I'll admit. Avery was a very strong sucker from the beginning which was my saving grace. Our problem was that she would latch on, then fall off, latch on, fall off....repeatedly throughout feedings. The first few days in the hospital the lactation consultants would check on her and say she was doing just fine. I asked them several times for tips, to check her latch, etc and they all reassured me she was doing well with it.

Then Avery lost some weight and that turned on their red flags. Of course this was the day before we left the hospital. Well, the lactation consultant who was on that day was our angel-she took one look at how Avery was eating and knew something wasn't right. So she gave me the tool that would make this all possible. The medela nipple shield. This thing was a lifesaver-she latched right on and stayed on and did really, really well with it. We left the hospital on Tuesday and went to her pediatrician on Wednesday and by then she had already gained some weight back which was good news.

For some reason, they want you to wean off of using the shield. To this day I have no idea why-it may have to do with a supply issue or something. We used the shield for about 4-5 weeks I think-I started weaning her during the day first and she would only use it at night. Sometimes we wouldn't eat without it, sometimes she didn't want it. Eventually I just tried not using it and she did just fine! I know by her 2 month doctors appointment, she was completely done using it.

Of course when you start there is some pain involved. With Avery not staying latched well, she really tore up my nipples (sorry if TMI!)-so the shield helped heal them as well. That was pretty painful. Once I weaned her off of the shield I had some pain too since I no longer had the protection of the shield. I would say it took a few weeks before she would eat with it being pain free. I remember every time she would latch on it would feel like razor blades! It was just a few seconds but man did it hurt! But like I said, after a week or two it was completely gone and pain free. I can say now that it's been almost 6 months and I'm pain free and she's still eating really well.

I would have to say that breastfeeding is pretty challenging, but totally worth it. You are on demand all of the time so in the beginning it seems like you are constantly feeding them-every 2 hours and at first it takes them about an hour to eat. So yeah, you get an hour break between and that's about it. It is draining, it is demanding, but it gets better. Now she goes roughly 3 hours between feedings and it takes her about 20min to eat now so it's much better. Yeah there are times that formula would be so much easier, but the health benefits of breastfeeding are so much better. Any antibodies I build up, I pass onto her. Any illness she has, my body produces the antibodies and passes them along. And of course everyone knows that breastfeeding is a time for you and baby to bond. It's a wonderful feeling to look down into that little face when she's eating and to know she looks to you for nourishment. Not to mention how cool it is to know that she is growing and developing from something that came from ME! That is pretty damn cool!

So, my advice? Don't knock it until you try it! You might just end up liking it (and you'll be saving money too!)! In 2 weeks I'll be reaching a milestone of 6 months of exclusive breastfeeding-that is one thing I'm very proud of! Then we'll start her on solids, but I'll still be mainly breastfeeding and will wean as we need to. I'll be sure to keep updates going on that!